Forest Fire Index Is High - 4/10/2024

 

Forest Fire Index Is High

Opposites Attract-Procrastination meets Preparedness 

Are we all in agreement that tax time is a romantic time of year?  It’s all in your perspective right?!?   If you can put your tax endeavors & other tasks aside for a few minutes…  please grab a comfort food & a favorite drink and sit with me for a while so I can share. 

Do you find it frustrating when people post pictures of foods sometimes?  The above are not amazing photographs, however they do have a purpose for today’s writing.  Have you ever heard of the “olive branch”?

First is my praise offering!  Sunday was the FIRST time I was able to walk into church without needing my cane, walker or wheelchair.  Thank you to each of you who are praying!  This is the true power of prayer in action.  My word for the year is “reflection” & it truly has been a powerful blessing to reflect.   My mobility issues have been one of the harder challenges of my cancer journey, as it also added a dimension of needing to depend on others more for assistance at times.  This greatly humbled me in ways that I can’t fully explain.  Pride can come before the fall if we aren’t careful. We need to be ready to recieve all God’s mercy & grace and let it flow freely in and out.  Not being able to go to church for awhile was another deep challenge for me.  Many times, my sweet friend, David-Joy Seeley had come over to watch the church service on-line with me.   What a blessing!  NEVER forget to count your blessings no matter where you are on your journey. 

I remember asking Joy, “Do you think I’ll be able to get to church again?” 

Sometimes if you just give a voice to your question, it can release the power that thought can hold over you.  My heart did truly feel blessed to be able to watch it on-line from home with Joy and ever so grateful to the tech team who makes this possible.  Truthfully deep inside I was so sad at times, because I LOVE to attend church; see my church family; worship the Lord in song and hear the powerful soul changing sermons in person.  First, God did allow me to go back to church with assistance from Jamie & my wheelchair.  I had tears in my eyes when I got to go through the church doors again and was greeted by my church family.  Then through time God allowed me to attend using my walker and that was a “cry freedom” moment because it gave me the ability to go & see some of my church family.  Thank you Mark Wade for coming to get me when Jamie was in the audio\video booth!  You might say my nature is to be a “jack-n-the-box”, as you never know when or where I would pop up before church  starts & even sometimes during the church service.  The fellowship of going to church has a component of such spiritual depth.  I don’t know about anyone else, but it was a deep, spiritual and emotional experience at both the Black Friday & Easter Sunday Services.  My heart has such a profound gratitude for what Christ has done for me\us, my tears freely flowed and it seemed I couldn’t stop them during the Black Friday Service. 

To be given the gift to walk into church last Sunday was a rich blessing that only God knew would happen & could orchestrate.  It is amazing when people pray and we listen to His still small voice no matter how counterintuitive.   

2 Corinthians 5:7 says, “For we walk by faith, not by sight.”  NKJV

To step out in deep faith though does require courage & a profound trust, especially while we are in the valley.  I can remember when God first told me I could take those steps with a cane to get from the bathroom sink to the toilet.  That was literally stepping out in faith.  God not only hears our prayers, but he also listens to our very hearts.  Does it mean we will always get what we pray for & want.  Absolutely NOT, but we MUST remember to give Him all the honor & glory due when He does.  That is what shows others the reflection of Jesus’ very hand upon our lives.  Again, I cannot thank each of you enough for the gift of your prayers!  I am indeed a life that has been changed.  

Humor has been incorporated into our marriage since the beginning.  Even during the harder seasons, we have always been able to make each other smile & laugh, which we know is a gift and a blessing.   Yesterday, Jamie & I both had an appt. with our family GP.   We go into our doctor appts. together.   Did you know that sometimes two heads are better than one? 

For the last while, my throat has been sore & my voice sounds raspy at times.  We try to do our devotions in the morning… so this  morning after we had done our devotions... 

Jamie looks at me and in a serious tone says, “I’m not sure if you heard Dr. B when he was talking yesterday or not, but he did say that you shouldn’t be talking to help your throat heal.” 

I hesitated for a second with a puzzled look on my face and quickly wondered through my ADD mind, wondering how could I have missed that part of the conversation?   But then I caught on to that one.    So don’t go thinking Jamie is completely innocent as he may look.  This was his attempt to use humor to his advantage, well if I hadn’t caught on. 

One day many years ago, I was very excited that I had finally been losing weight and maybe a bit of pride was mixed with my humor when I said,
“If I keep this up, I might blow away with the breeze.”

His response was without hesitation, “What hurricane is coming through?!?”  

Lets just say that some pride can be deflated in a positive way with humor.     

There is one thing I need to clear up before any of you think for one minute that I am a saint to live with all the time.  If we are honest, we all have our moments.  Have you ever thought about what your triggers are?  Why they are, requires a deeper dive… just ask my counselor Michele Langmead.   Can’t wait until I see what reward God gives her for working with me.  I told you my guardian Angel Buck wants to retire. 

Most of us have heard it said that “opposites attract”.  For Jamie and I this seems to be true, though through the years you can grow together in a deeper way, with the Holy Spirits’ help.  Being opposites can be a fun adventure at times and being exposed to our opposite perspectives can be good for the heart & soul, if you will allow God to work in you.  Yet other times this can “ignite some sparks” which indicates an opportunity to heal. 

They are right when they say that, “It only takes a spark to start a flame”!  

This was one of those times in our marriage that we needed a “fireside chat”.   Let’s just say that God’s still working on us and He will be until He takes us home.  Back to the romance of tax time.  You see Jamie can be a “procrastinator” and I am “Miss Preparedness”.  Believe it or not, there are times these perspectives starkly clash.   Income tax time seems to be one of those times in our home.  Come on, how many of you really enjoy tax season?  As I’ve openly shared before, my strength is NOT in the area of math, so my stress automatically goes up a notch this time of the year.   You might be able to imagine that Mr. Procrastination starts a spark with Miss Preparedness during the tax season.  Sparks can turn into a flame, which in turn can ignite an uncontrolled forest fire, if we are not careful.  As I do NOT like owing anyone money, I want to pay what is owed as soon as possible.   BUT I do NOT want to pay what is unnecessary.  If I am honest, I find the whole tax system very overwhelmingly confusing.  Through the years I’ve tried to learn things that will make this time of year less stressful.  Thus I created a “special income tax folder” that I keep putting things in all through the year, so we will have easy access to the needed tax documents.   When at home, by nature, Jamie is a procrastinator of things that he does not like to do.  Therefore he tends not to place things in this folder and prefers to use the hunt & seek method when taxes are due.  Maybe because when he was working on the boat he was on 24\7 & there was no room for procrastination, thus he just needed to relax when home.  Well now he is home all the time and he helps with all of the everyday things.  He’s right on target with doing the basic daily things.  We’ve actually laughed at the fact that we have changed rolls in that area.  I am more limited in what I can do, so I have been forced to adapt and just chill out, on what I can’t do.  Also had to adjust to the fact that Jamie doesn’t do things the way that I used to do them.  Can anyone relate to this?  Incase you don’t know, this is from the girl who used to even clean out the junk drawer!  But that is a story for another day. 

Hum during this tax season you may have already summized that our opposite approaches to income tax ignites sparks that produce a flame, until it is extinguished.  Noticed I said extinguished NOT distinguished.   All I can say is that it is a good thing the fire index outside is low at this time of the year, because it is HIGH in our home.   Well I lost the war with patience, which can allow my stress to surface in a colorful, audible way.  It has been noted that I can have a flare for the dramatic at times and he can be stubborn.  It seems Mr. Procrastination & Miss Preparedness can intensely clash at these times.  When this happens, it also allows our hidden triggers to surface, that still need to be worked on or healed.  You’ve all heard it said, “ Don’t make a mountain out of a mole hill.”  Well when my colorful ADD side kicks in, I can turn it into Mt. Everest!  Then he can shut down & I am on full throatle.  Can anyone relate?  God truly can even use these times for good, IF we allow Him to. When the Sparks flew and the flame ignited, I asked the Holy Spirit to CHANGE my attitude. Unbeknownst to me Jamie had done the same.  When I asked for help, the Holy Spirit had to bring me down a notch or two, so I could receive His help.  Has He ever had to do that to you?  Well Jamie decided to retreat from the heat and go out & do the errands at that point.  They say, “If you can’t take the heat, to stay out of the kitchen.”  It was a VERY wise choice by him.  When he left, the joke between us was that He wondered if by dark it would be safe for him to return home.  I did laugh out loud & he smiled.  As I continued on the adventure of gathering our missing income tax items and had had some success and the Holy Spirit kept working with me to achieve my attitude change.  Well, I acutally began to chill out a bit. 

Have any of you ever “stress eaten before”?  It seems that I decided to reward myself by having some coffee ice-cream with ALL the toppings… chocolate sauce, marshmallow & caramel sauce!  If you don’t believe me just ask  Dianna Fraser  &  Angela Wade , as they have witnessed my love for this first hand.  Once in a while I can even get them to indulge in this with me.  Though Ang prefers vanilla ice-cream with all her toppings.  What are friends for, right?  My heart knows that “stress eating” is NOT a good habit, but sometimes you just need a treat to help you sit & just breathe.  Those of you with ADD understand the depth of this accomplishment when it happens.  After eating my sundae creation, my spirit calmed even more.  This is when my humor comes out, so I decided to send Jamie a text message.

I sent him a picture of my sundae & told him, “I will be in a better mood when you come home.”  After all I did want him to come home before dark since he was bringing more food.   

He immediately sent me a picture of his Tim Horton’s muffin and said, “I understand, LOL.” 

Pictures provided above of our food “olive branches”.  

After he got home & we exchanged some more humor and ate supper, we then we indulged in our heartfelt, fireside chat.  Making up can be fun.  I told you tax time was romantic!    Those Christ-centered, heartfelt chats, can be healing & life giving.  Many years ago, I asked my Grammy Snow if she had any advice before we got married she said, not to go to bed angry.  The bible  reinforces this sound advice.   

In Ephesians 4:26-27 it says, “ ‘In your anger do not sin.’  Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.’ ” 

If you stop and absorb this, there is deep, divine wisdom held within this passage.  When applied, it truly can enhance your relationships & lives.  Have you ever gotten really angry about something & gone to bed angry that night.  This can become an unhealthy practice, which in turn can just keep spiraling.  That’s how satan works his way into our lives and gains his foothold.  Let me just confess, that Jamie & I know this from experience.  It starts with just little things, but those things compound, fester and can become our Mt. Everest with the passage of time.  Just as God doesn’t have any favorites we need to accept that how each of us feels is equally important to God, therefore it should be to us.   We need to give up the desire to be right and exchange it for the desire to be more Christ-like.  I remember one pastor saying to me that we should never point our finger at someone else when you are upset.  Point your finger at yourself & sincerely ask God what you need to change.  We are all human but, I do try to let my first response be to ask the Holy Spirit to help me change my attitude.  Through Christian counseling and many years of learning to apply the skills of responding and NOT reacting, I have learned that how we get along is very deep and multilayered.  Yes it can be down right messy at times.  I am talking chocolate pudding food fight messy while you are dressed in white.  The clean up can be anything but easy at times too.  BUT don’t forget to at least taste the pudding along the way as you work on it.  God has taught me over & over again that it is so important to learn to “respond” instead of “react”.  We react with our emotions & can respond through the power of the Holy Spirit.  So if you didn’t get an immediate answer from the Holy Spirit the other day, Jamie & I were both keeping him quite busy!   Right, Joy David-Joy Seeley  Joy Seeley!  She had simply sent me a message to check on me & I responded by saying that she needed to pray that God would change my attitude!!!  There are times that it is good to enlist friends to pray.  How many times have we reached out to Judy Dewar regarding prayer requests?  There was one season I had Judy on speed dial, but she didn’t waver.  It was such a blessing to have someone to stop & pray with me.  For me praying can be the key that allows me to release it to God.  Yes there will be times that it takes more than once to pray & release it.  I can’t really count, or want to FULLY admit, how hard it is to release something to God at times.  It’s like our request is a balloon on a string.  We think we have released the request by praying because the balloon went higher and is out of our direct line of vision.  Then something happens so we move our hand and we realize our request has a string attached to the ballon, so we bring it back down to try to “control” it ourselves.   I don’t know about you but I’ve POPPED a few balloons in my day.  I guess you could say that I have burst my own bubble!  OUCH, but it is a powerful lesson when it happens.  That’s when that nasty word “control” can rear its ugly head again.  How many of you have faced that “controlling beast” inside yourself?  As humans we tend to want to control things when things feel out of control.  In essence the only things we are in control of is our attitude and how we choose to walk out our relationship with God.  He does offer us a lifetime of healing in this broken world, if we choose to accept and do the Holy hard work.  If you see someone struggling what do you do?  Do you shy away from them?  Do you judge them or do you pray for them?  What about when God gives you a nudge to reach out to them but the way HE has asked, does NOT line up with the way you feel is best.  There is a monumental difference!!  The question is do we really want to reflect Christ?  There are many ways to walk alongside someone who is hurting. Prayer is a powerful way to walk with them in the unseen spiritual realm.  Well there is a profound subject for another day. 

On May 6th I am receiving “The Blue Ribbon Special”, as I am scheduled for a Bone Scan, CT Scan & Blood Work.  As I am a “frequent flyer” this drill is familiar to me.  It does make for a longer day though.  Trish Parker is familiar with how many tests & appts. that they can schedule in a day, as she has gone with me for one of these marathons.  Trish what about the reconstruction appt.  .  So glad you went in with me for this appt.  “Sign me up.” Right Trish?!    We definitely made the best of it with humor!  Would appreciate your prayers for these upcoming Scans & BW.  Jamie will be going with me & handling my food cravings from the HIGH does of Prednisone to prevent an allergic reaction to the CT Scan dye.  Bryan Clouser, he has the multi-pocketed snack vest ready! 

This girl has gone from needing a cane, a walker & a wheelchair in our apartment to being able to walk around the apartment for most of the day unassisted.  There are times I do still need the walker but they are much less.   For the upcoming tests I’m not ready for the marathon of the hospital halls yet, so it will be Jamie assisting where needed. For all my  gains, my heart knows my friends that  these are a gift & a miracle.  The power of prayer is real.  God does answer our prayers, but not always in the way/s we expect.  It is always in His perfect timing & not necessarily  ours

Before my cancer diagnosis, my prayer to God was to change me, draw me closer to Him & break the chains, so I could truly “dance in the deep with Him”.  My heart wanted whatever it required of me to bring Him glory & show people the same gift of salvation I had received despite my brokenness.  This was definitely NOT what I expected but God continues to draw me close to Him.  He also continues to teach me many profound things through this metastatic breast cancer journey.   Each day we are given is truly a gift!!!  We all know this, but do we truly live like we do?  The only difference between you & I is that I have been made very aware that my time here has limitations, but in reality all of ours does.  None of us know what day will be our last on earth.  The critical component is do we know with complete certainty our final destination?  Not being mobile taught me the precious reality of the gift of EVERY step I can take truly is.  Sadly in our humanness, there are times that we don’t fully appreciate what we have until it’s gone.  Even in our brokenness, God can use us.  I challenge you to ask yourself if you know your final destination?  After all it is the most important one of all. 

Incase you are wondering, we did turn everything in to our accountant  last Friday.  Oh Jody Rideout thanks for bailing us out too.  Or should I say for putting some water on theflames with your help.  Now we wait until we get the returns back.    Do you ever get butterflies in your stomach?  Remember butterflies emerged from a cocoon.  For each one too emerge is a lot of hard work, but it is worth it in the end. 

Just a couple days ago, I needed to call a visa company to be sure my card was cancelled. It turned out to be a 45 minute conversation that only God could have orchestrated.  God never ceases to amaze me.  Please pray for Vince for me.  How will you let God use you today?  Remember there is NO deed too small.   Thank you in advance for the gift of your encouragement, love, hugs & many prayers.  May God continue to bless you all in just the ways you need. 

ps  How is the Forest Fire  Index in Your House.