Sept 19-28th, 2012 Trials Can Bloom Into Blessings - Meeting Baby Owen
Trials Can Bloom Into Blessings - Meeting Baby Owen
SEPT 19th-28th, 2012
It was a long day at the hospital on Sept. 18th but God was so good to allow me to get all the tests I needed done in one day (Chest X-ray, ultra sound of my organs, bone scan) my initial meeting with Dr. Mohiuddin [radiation oncologist] & initial meeting with Dr. Burnell [chemo oncologist] and blood work. Jamie's first full day off was a busy day at the hospital with me, but we felt blessed to be able to be together. My heart sees through his deeds, how much he truly loves me. Honestly, it was an overwhelming day trying to comprehend all that had been done and shared with us. We arrived at the hospital at 8:30am and by the time I had the required blood draw for my chemo panel it was 5:45pm. At first, my mind was befuddled with trying to understand & process these things. This is when satan loves to try to get a foothold. Then God spoke to my heart to type out all the positive things that had happened that day on my iPad, as we drove home from the hospital. If you listen to His still small voice and obey what He is asking you to do, it is here, where God will allow you to gain true perspective.
My Positives
No Dissection of Lymph Nodes Needed - That meant No OTHER operation needed!
Stage 2 cancer - NOT 3 or 4!
HER2NU - Negative (+1) That meant NO shots needed every three weeks for a year when I completed my treatments!
Chest X-ray - Clear NO cancer visible
Ultra Sounds - Clear NO cancer visible
75% Chance of Cancer not coming back after Chemo & Radiation treatments were finished
6 shots needed - one within 24 hours after each of the 6 chemo treatments I would need - NOT the 66 shots first presented, that would have meant 1 shot daily for 11 days after each treatment.
You see satan loves to try to blind us from seeing the good and having us focus on what we haven't comprehended, which we often can interpret as negative. I have discovered that the unknown can cause a harsh stress within. We like to be in control, but in essence we are NEVER in control. God is in control. We only need to look up, listen and trust Him. He has a plan and to follow His plan for our lives requires us to step out in blind faith. Think about that for a moment. You are somewhere you have never been and it is pitch black... now you must take that first step forward into what you perceive as total darkness. There is a familiar voice that can be heard here. When we are confused we want what is familiar... it is the still small familiar voice of God that we long for. When you follow His still small voice and take that step forward you will see there was light all along. It was the light of God. When you walk in His light, the deception of total darkness that satan has created to deceive you will dissipate as you eyes adjust from the darkness to the light that God has provided to guide your path.
My phone rang bright & early on the morning of Sept. 19th. It was the oncology department calling with the dates for my picc-line to be put in & for my required heart scan… which needs to be done before I can start my chemo Oct. 17th. Oncology had arranged them to be on Oct. 16th, the day before my chemo treatments were to start. That meant I had a small window of opportunity and could try to book a plane ticket to go to Kansas! Christmas would come early for me this year, if I could book that ticket. I would get to meet baby Owen for the first time and spend time with my grandchildren before my Chemo starts. My heart was so excited at the possibility. God is so amazing at how He provides for our needs. The miracle was that I got a plane ticket for 27 Sept. 2012 and got to use my air miles with some of Jamie's air miles to purchase it. My round trip ticket only cost $60.00, which was the transfer fee for Jamie to give me his air miles. Our travel agent would not take anything for helping getting a seat held for me for 24 hours, while we got the air miles transferred etc. Of course satan tried to make it difficult and it took most of our day to get all the details taken care of, but the miracle happened. With only 8 days notice I had my round trip ticket to go to Kansas! Yes, I am sitting at my daughter's table typing this note to you all. God is so amazing, as He knew this is just what my spirit & heart needed. Sometimes our spirit needs to be rejuvenated before we go into battle. Even a solider needs a quiet place to rest. This warrior is a child of God, right Charity.
The day of travel, I was feeling tired & excited. Jamie drove, my brother Henry & his daughter Kristina to the airport along with me. God was so good to let us all end up flying out on the same day. My flight was a little delayed which would make my connection tight to catch my plane in New York. God spoke to my heart to speak to a gentleman in the terminal gate, while I was waiting. Never question God just do it! God had placed this wonderful gentleman in my path, who would help me find my way through the New York airport and enable me to catch my flight on time! After he told me that he travelled 5 days a week and that he would help me find my way through the New York airport, so I could make this connection... then we just kept talked. It seems this gentleman had a wife who had had breast cancer twice and is doing fine. Just stop and think about the person God hand picked to help me! When we got to New York, this gentleman even flagged down a cart to give me a ride so I would make my connection. Thank you God for providing for all my needs before I even know that I had them.
There is a song by Laura Story called, “Blessings”, which explains this raw, but true concept, of how our blessings often come through our trials in life. Maybe, her song will help you capture that your blessings can come through raindrops and healing can come through tears. Our greatest time of trials are truly often just God’s mercy in disguise. Remember if you watch her video or listen to her song; that if I had not gotten that stressful news about the parts of my pathology report on the FIRST full day that my husband had left for his two week shift away at work (which spurred me to the reality that I needed to see Dr. Scarth earlier than my scheduled appointment), I would not have the blessing of enjoying these moments with my grandchildren in Kansas, before I started my chemo on Oct. 17th. Thank you all for your treasured prayers, worlds of kindness and gifts of encouragement (thank you for my hand made hats Aunt Elaine. Look at the picture above and KNOW, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that prayer does make a difference. Pick someone you know who is walking through a trial and give them your precious gift of prayers. Remember on those cloudy days to look around and see the blessings that God has placed within the shadows of your trials. What joy it was to surprise my grandchildren, who thought they would not see me until summer 2013. What a blessing to meet precious baby Owen for the first time! When Audri & Ethan “Face Timed” me on their iPod touch on Friday morning, they discovered that Nana was in their finished basement! The stone that was dropped in the pond through your blessings of prayers, continues to have its ripple effects in many peoples lives.
My Love, (((HUGS))) and May God bless,
Paulette
